life without regrets

I’ve been reading a lot about people having regrets over things they’ve said, things they’ve done, people they’ve dated… I say, “Stop regretting things!”

I know this is easier said than done. I have some things in my past that probably were not the best decisions or best people or best outfits or whatever… but I’m realizing more and more that without them, my life may have taken a dramatically different turn.

On the other hand… or on a different finger of the same hand, maybe… I don’t ever regret telling someone I love them or care about them, because everyone should get to hear that they are loved by someone. I don’t regret my past relationships, because they all taught me something… and they all had something good or exciting or fun to offer – at the time. Now, it would be like putting on my high school band uniform… just silly and unnecessary.

I just don’t think that regret is a productive way to expend one’s emotions. There are so many more feelings to feel… joy, humor, love, acceptance, patience. I think about Coretta Scott King… I doubt she regretted being married to Dr. King, even though she lost him in a horrible and violent way. But I’m sure that her time with him was amazing and full of love, and that she wouldn’t ever trade that.

I hope that my friends living in “what-if” driven regret and uncertainty can find a little peace, and that they know I’m here to be a sounding board or bearer of frank advice (however useful it may be) when they need it.

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One response to “life without regrets

  1. I really like your band uniform metaphor. That makes so much sense. At the time, the band uniform was who you were, something you were part of and proud of it, something you enjoyed I would imagine. But that time is over, and frankly my friend, I’d laugh at you if you put it on!

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