Stuck somewhere in between

I started my new job in Austin yesterday, and I really like it a lot.  The station is cool, I really like everyone in my department, and the work is challenging, but not so hard that I feel like I am going to flounder.  I have been trying to keep close contact up with Ryan, since he’s still back in Sherman remotely looking for a job and occupying the house while we’re trying to sell it.

I’m staying with my old friend from way-back-in-high-school, Sara.  She’s got a cool condo about 10 minutes away from the station, and has generously let me stay in her guest room while I learn the ropes at work and try to find an apartment that will do for Ryan and I for a while.  I haven’t seen a lot of her this week since I came in on Monday, because I’m working nightside this week and she’s usually in bed or almost in bed by the time I get here.

It’s kind of hard to immerse myself in life here in Austin right now, though.  I’m eager to explore the city but I don’t want to do too much until Ryan comes down here for good, so that we can make it our home together.  I feel a little like really enjoying my job is sort of betraying my life back in Sherman, although this is my job now, and the reality is that I do enjoy it a lot.  I am a little more invested in it every day, and I know that I’m going to love it at my new station.

But I have left a big piece of my life behind – as long as Ryan is still back home, the transition won’t be complete.  I’ve only gone to work, HEB, and a Weight Watchers meeting since I’ve been here.  But there honestly isn’t a lot that I want to do without Ryan around.  I want to be able to enjoy and explore new things with him here… I want to save the good stuff for doing with him!

So, for now, I just remember why I’m down here at all… to go to work at my new job.  Which I do like a whole lot.  I just feel like everything’s in limbo right now.


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